during february weve been taking some time out of sex ed class for "black power hour".
its pretty lame but i was doing good in it due to my extensive knowledge of stuff you can do with peanuts.
that is until today.
i totally screwed up my presentation of "most important black guy".
turns out david blaine isnt black.
he has black hair.
originally posted: Friday, February 18, 2005
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Event: Monday, February 14, 2005
Valentines Day - 5 stars
When: Monday, February 14, 2005 @ 12:00 AM
Duration: 24 hours
Where: wherever hearts are young and free
today is the day when we honor love.
and the memory of the two st. valentines.
who were both beaten and beheaded.
and then that third st who lived in africa, the one we dont know anything about.
except that he probably didnt die of natural causes.
Valentine's Day
yep.
valentines day.
and you want to know what i got for valentines day?
1 card.
from gary.
with a poem in it:
“no one will be able to hear you
when you begin to scream,
because ill bite down on your neck
and suck your sugar cream.”
so… thanks for that gary.
originally posted: Monday, February 14, 2005
valentines day.
and you want to know what i got for valentines day?
1 card.
from gary.
with a poem in it:
“no one will be able to hear you
when you begin to scream,
because ill bite down on your neck
and suck your sugar cream.”
so… thanks for that gary.
originally posted: Monday, February 14, 2005
Chinese New Year
apparently those chinese bootleg calendars are missing the first page.
cause theyre only getting to the new year now
wang li came in today and was all like, “happy new year!”
and i was all like, "sorry what was that? i couldnt hear your incredibly poor timing over the roar of ash wednesday."
ash wednesday owns.
the year of the chicken doesnt.
originally posted: Wednesday, February 09, 2005
cause theyre only getting to the new year now
wang li came in today and was all like, “happy new year!”
and i was all like, "sorry what was that? i couldnt hear your incredibly poor timing over the roar of ash wednesday."
ash wednesday owns.
the year of the chicken doesnt.
originally posted: Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Sex Ed
sarah is having a baby.
keiths baby.
i miss keith and his lack of knowledge about sexual contraceptives.
no one was too surprised though.
i mean, you saw that katie couric special.
but now weve got to take sex ed all over again.
and from our creepy fat gym teacher.
yeah, the one who offered to pay me $20 if i would let him film me putting on a pair of socks.
so in accordance with the bush abstinence policy they told us about all the stds we could get and then they showed us ‘the killer condom’.
man.
talk about mission accomplished.
originally posted: Wednesday, February 02, 2005
keiths baby.
i miss keith and his lack of knowledge about sexual contraceptives.
no one was too surprised though.
i mean, you saw that katie couric special.
but now weve got to take sex ed all over again.
and from our creepy fat gym teacher.
yeah, the one who offered to pay me $20 if i would let him film me putting on a pair of socks.
so in accordance with the bush abstinence policy they told us about all the stds we could get and then they showed us ‘the killer condom’.
man.
talk about mission accomplished.
originally posted: Wednesday, February 02, 2005
Event: Tuesday, February 01, 2005
UN Calls "No Genocide!" - 5 stars like a lot of people i was really worried about this whole "sudan genocide" thing. |
Get Straight
today was sweet cause all i had to do was go see the get straight program at school.
get straight is one of those things where they bring inmates into the school and they either teach you a valuable lesson or escape and kill a student.
turns out that, while you need parental permission to leave school and visit a gumdrop taste testing factory, as long as the prisoners are on school grounds you can go see them anytime.
but the guys there had been arrested for a bunch of different things. like frontin'... and vehicular manslaughter.
while the thing had too few violent prison stories and too many poems it was still pretty cool cause there were some alumni there.
go fighting cowboy bears!
the coolest thing was that kenneth was there.
hes looking good.
hes got some cool new tattoos, but i didnt want to ask him about them cause you never know which one means prison bride.
being a prison bride would suck.
but if todays presentation taught me anything it was that most prisoners are whiny and introspective.
so if i do ever end up there all i have to do is stick a shiv into the biggest poetry writing sissy and ill be king of the joint.
originally posted: Tuesday, January 25, 2005
get straight is one of those things where they bring inmates into the school and they either teach you a valuable lesson or escape and kill a student.
turns out that, while you need parental permission to leave school and visit a gumdrop taste testing factory, as long as the prisoners are on school grounds you can go see them anytime.
but the guys there had been arrested for a bunch of different things. like frontin'... and vehicular manslaughter.
while the thing had too few violent prison stories and too many poems it was still pretty cool cause there were some alumni there.
go fighting cowboy bears!
the coolest thing was that kenneth was there.
hes looking good.
hes got some cool new tattoos, but i didnt want to ask him about them cause you never know which one means prison bride.
being a prison bride would suck.
but if todays presentation taught me anything it was that most prisoners are whiny and introspective.
so if i do ever end up there all i have to do is stick a shiv into the biggest poetry writing sissy and ill be king of the joint.
originally posted: Tuesday, January 25, 2005
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