Co-op

im coming home for spring break and im really looking forward to seeing some of the old gang.
but something happened to me since i last saw you guys that im not exactly proud of.
so i want you to hear it straight from me and not on the street.
im going to be living in a cooperative house next year.
there.
i said it.
in case you dont know, co-ops are where hippies go after a hard day of drum circles, tie-dying, and solving “groovy” mysteries.
and they spring up around college campuses like mold on bread.
i waited to come out about this till i knew for sure i was in, but its been a foregone conclusion for a while now.
youve got to get voted into the house to make sure they dont let in anyone with bad chi, but my interview went great.
i lied and said my name was moonbeam and that i spent last summer on a peyote trip, during which i dreamed a coyote ate my feet, which taught me the importance of renewable energy.
i swear to god: they were crying.
the real question is: why i would want to live there?
because the rents about $4 a month and its right next to campus.
if ive got to plant corn and hand out pamphlets about 9/11 conspiracies to keep from paying my own water and electric, so be it.

originally posted: Saturday, March 08, 2008