we had our graduation ceremony yesterday so im now, officially, no longer a high school student!
the ceremony was alright but personally i was just happy they let me participate.
the school originally didnt want me there, even though i got that "attempted murder" plead down to "2nd degree mischief with intent to maim".
the biggest surprise about the whole thing was that wang li was only salutatorian.
ever since hed waddled into our hearts in 7th grade and we saw he was chinese, wed pegged him to be #1.
but no, that distinction went to little miss aryan.
the whole thing was clearly rigged.
the guidance counselor probably fixed the grades so that shed invite him to her parties.
but maybe im being unfair.
maybe he just looked deep into his heart and asked himself "who would hitler make valedictorian?"
probably goebbels.
it doesnt matter though because wang got to make his speech first and he totally served her!
she tried to follow up, but she was like "class of 2007... i mean…" and i was in the crowd going "choke choke choke!"
they sent some people over to talk to me but they didnt kick me out cause they knew i was right.
you cant officially punish someone for telling it like it is.
so after the ceremony me and jacob took wang out to see x-men 3.
see, as i write this, wang is making his way back to his homeland to get some fancy de-chineseification plastic surgery for a low, low price in one of chinas many shady back alley clinics.
what better way to celebrate him undoing his squinty eyes then to see a movie about people who dont want to change the fact theyre covered in blue fur?
originally posted: Saturday, May 27, 2006
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