Sven

okay a lot of people were asking me about this today so let me go ahead and explain:
when i got home friday i uber-tired and just wanted to take a uber-nap.
so imagine my surprise when i found this nordic punk in my bed.
since my birthday was last week i figured he was probably some crap belated present, but when i asked my parents if we could trade him in for a chinese girl they told me he was an exchange student.
not a sex slave.
his name is sven and not only is he not here to pleasure me, until he leaves my family wont be eating anything but meatballs.
my grandpa didnt kill his grandpa in ww2 so we could eat commie food.
i was going to write about it in my blog that night, but my parents made me take him out for a whirlwind night on the town.
gay.
not g-h-e-y, gay.
but ive already got a plan worked out on how to deal with this guy.
im going to leave a trail of pickled herring leading to my basement.
commies cant resist that stuff.
once ive got him in there i can keep him locked up until his homeland wants him back.
or he starves.

originally posted: Monday, August 29, 2005